My relationship with President-elect Donald Trump is complicated.

For instance, it makes me shiver a little when I type his name now, because I think he’s a dangerous lunatic elected largely by fools who think they proved a point.

And maybe they did.

But I’m an optimist by nature, albeit a cynical one, and I’m an American, dammit. Part of me wants to believe that it’s possible Trump can — gulp — make American great again. Even if it’s by accident.

Because I know Trump is no Republican. The guy has two gold helicopters, for crying out loud, which is the most fiscally irresponsible purchase I’ve ever heard of this side of Truck Nutz.

I don’t see him falling in line with his fellow GOPers, and can even imagine him setting himself up in a position adversarial to the likes of Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell and Speaker of the House Paul Ryan, because screw those guys. Where were they when he needed them?

Then he gets back on his Twitter and shows his ass, and all the morons who believe in this guy suddenly think they can boycott Hamilton!

Good luck with that one.

It’s been like this every time: Trump announces a massive public works project, reminding me of the last true New Yorker who occupied the White House: Franklin Delano Roosevelt. And then I learn that two of his economic advisors, Wilbur Ross and Peter Navarro, have cooked up a scheme to privatize huge chunks of our infrastructure, selling it off to investors and subsidizing the deal with federal tax incentives.[pullquote]The guy has two gold helicopters, for crying out loud.[/pullquote]

Of the plan for his first 100 days, I like the part about term limits on Congress. But I don’t like the part where he pretends climate change isn’t real. I kinda like the renegotiation of NAFTA and the restrictions on lobbying for former lawmakers, but I’m appalled by his stance on immigration, hints by his staffers of a Muslim registry, or the racists and sociopaths he’s choosing to surround himself with.

He’s ignoring decades of tradition by hiding his finances from the American people, and wedging business opportunities into serious governmental meetings. He doesn’t want to live in the White House. He’s turned the process of cabinet selection into a stupid reality show. He doesn’t understand theater. He’s declared the media an enemy, set a new bottom for the national discourse and doesn’t seem to understand the responsibilities of the office he’s been elected to hold.

You know, maybe it’s not that complicated. The guy’s a mess.

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