Let’s start by stating the obvious: People who reverse park — that is, back into parking spots instead of driving directly into them as god intended — are only doing it to show off.

It is not easier than parking nose-first in a space. How could it be? And despite whatever these people will tell you, it’s not “almost as easy” either. Reverse parking requires more precision than a parallel park, which is one of the trickiest moves in parking. And sure, it’s easy to pull out of a parking space when you’re already facing the right way, but it’s a fair sight easier to pull out of a spot in reverse than to pull into one.

It looks suspicious; it jams up the driving zones; it causes complete havoc in lots with slanted spaces and one-way thoroughfares.

And how are you going to load your groceries like that?

Some will recognize that the nose-out parking style enables a faster getaway, and it obscures rear-mounted tags, to which I ask: What kind of caper are you pulling here at the movie theater where you’ll need to leave in such haste and anonymity?

Others will point out that in other countries, everyone parks that way. Bah! We’re Americans. We go in head first, guns a-blazin’; we’ll stay as long as we like, and we’ll worry about what happens when we leave as the time comes.

There are a thousand excuses to park in reverse, but just one reason — to exclaim, “Look at me! I can drive backwards!” It’s a minor skill at best, like knowing how to tie a bow tie.

I will give a clarification: It is perfectly acceptable to drive through a parking spot into the one from the opposing row so that the car remains facing out. For one, the math is completely different. And then, it’s not quite reverse parking now, is it?

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